I see life as a river of emotion.

Feelings happen + then pass away.

Energy peaks + falls + rests.

Aliveness moves through us, taking all sorts of forms along the way before cresting like a wave + dissolving back into the flow of life.

I’ve been trying to be in this river.

Which means allowing the feelings as they come up.

And not just the ones that make sense, feel cathartic, or bring comfort.

But also the doubt I can’t pin down,

The vague sense of shame that makes me want to hide,

The boredom I want to escape,

The random wave of anxiety that twists in my stomach.

I’ve been experimenting with allowing all of this to be part of the river.

To feel + let the current flow.

As I’ve been practicing this, I've noticed how often I instinctively flinch away from my feelings.

How often I try to stop the river or outrun the current.

But despite the discomfort, I’m finding that it feels so much better to let the river flow.

To not run away or push down or reject the way aliveness is showing up in the moment.

To let the feelings just be sensations in my body, energy moving through me.

To remember that I’m here to participate in something powerful + real + alive,

That this is available to me in each + every moment,

And that I'm big + brave enough to meet it.