Not allowing ourselves to feel our feelings is internalized capitalism.
Here’s what I mean:
When I talk with folks about their emotions + why they’re unwilling to allow + feel them, it’s usually less about the discomfort of the feelings themselves + more about their disruptive + inconvenient quality.
People don’t tell me they’re afraid to feel the ache of sadness, the twistiness of anxiety, or the pain of shame.
They tell me they’re afraid the feelings will overwhelm, paralyze, or distract them.
They describe their feelings as inconvenient + out of control + too much + impossible to handle.
Because those feelings -- those wild + real + intense energies moving through us -- threaten the linear progress of productivity + the efficiency of our work.
They violate society’s expectations for how we “should” be in the world at all times: productive, rational, and in control.
But not allowing the organic (+ sometimes chaotic) unfolding of our aliveness is internalized capitalism.
Believing we can only ever allow emotion (a core + healthy facet of our humanity) if it’s convenient or if we have a “good enough” reason (as if our feelings can be plugged into a linear + analytical formula) is internalized capitalism.
I understand the fear + reluctance.
When our survival depends on being able to make it in capitalism, it makes sense that we would fear anything that interrupts our productivity or threatens our work.
But there are so many ways in which this external system has hijacked our nervous systems + made us believe that its values are our own + simply the “right” way to be in the world.
And I believe it’s important to find ways to push back + unwind this programming.
For our own wellbeing + for the future we hope to create.
In my mind, this is about claiming our aliveness in a system that tries to disconnect us from our energy, commodify our life-force, extract what's precious, and convince us we’re never enough -- all for profit (that the vast majority of us will never see).
And one way we claim our aliveness is by feeling our emotions.
(Because emotion is one way our aliveness expresses itself.)
Which means that feeling deeply is an act of power + resistance that helps us build a better world, catalyze imagination, be fully alive, and claim what's always been ours.
Your emotions can change the world.
What might it mean to let them flow + do their work + unleash their power?