Navigating Stuckness

Stuckness is one of my least favorite feelings.

I hate feeling uninspired + lethargic.  I despise the moments when it feels like I’m not moving forward -- when all my efforts at progress + creativity feel like walking through a mud pit. 

Maybe you can relate.

I know that for me, even though I enjoy my moments of peace, stillness, and quiet, I prefer those sprinkled between action + momentum + flow.  

Because I want to be moving + making + growing!  I want to surf the waves of my creativity + throw myself into new adventures + get started on my next trek up the mountain.  

I want to feel like I’m making progress.

And in the moments when I don’t...it doesn’t feel great.

So here is some of the I wisdom I try to remember + some of the advice I try to give myself in those moments: 

1) Stuckness is part of being human.

I hate that this is true, but since it is, I might as well roll with it.

Stuckness always feels the hardest when I push against it + make it mean that something is wrong with me -- when I forget that it’s something I can expect as part of the human experience.

When I remember that moments of stuckness are part of it (life, creativity, growth, being human), it still doesn’t feel great, but at least there’s some context + understanding + a little breathing room.

2) Things are still happening when we feel stuck!

Like change, growth, processing, rest, healing, alchemy, becoming, and deep + slow movement.

We are organic creatures.  We don’t move in straight lines, and our progress isn’t linear.  

That’s just part of this aliveness thing.

Which means that stuckness is often an invitation to pause, rest, and sink into these invisible forces at work under the surface.

This helps me (sometimes) see stuckness as an in-between, liminal space.

It reminds me to ask: What if there’s a magic at work that I can’t see or feel yet?  What if there’s something happening *for* me here?  

3) Feel your feelings.

Sometimes stuckness happens because I’m not letting myself feel my anxiety, frustration, uncertainty, or confusion.

Sometimes, I’m stuck because I'm holding back + stuffing down what’s real inside of me -- my feelings, my desires, my needs -- what I need to say, what I want to express, what I yearn to acknowledge.

So it’s worth asking: Where am I holding back?  What am I denying or avoiding?  What am I afraid to feel here? 

4) Look at the long game.

A little while back, I felt stuck creatively.  I was bemoaning my complete lack of artistic flow + new ideas + creative energy.

And then I stepped back.  I looked at the big picture.  

I remembered all of the art I've created in the past 6 months, which was quite a lot.

Sure, I felt stuck in that moment.  But was I actually stuck when I considered the larger trajectory?  Not really, no.

Sometimes, we’re less stuck than we think. 

When you look at the big picture + remember the long game, are you actually stuck? 

And what changes when you take stock of your accomplishments and consider all the ways you’ve grown in the past 3 months, year, or decade? 

Try looking bigger + giving yourself credit where you find it. 

5) Think smaller.

Stuckness + perfectionism go hand-in-hand.

It’s easy to feel stuck if I think my progress needs to be perfect, my creativity needs to be grand, or my achievements need to be huge (whatever that means).

But most of the time, all I need to do to get unstuck is the one right next thing.

I need to go for a walk, take a shower, send that email, fold the laundry, or spend 15 no-pressure minutes on that art piece.

In other words, I need to step down from my grandiose visions of success to take the one concrete + humble step in that direction.

I need to take tiny steps, seek out small successes + failures, take care of the basics, and tend to what's needed in the moment.
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So, if you, like me, sometimes feel stuck, welcome to the weird + beautiful + nonlinear process of being human!  Let's love ourselves, do the best we can, and find our way forward together.